High achievers. Successful people. Talented employees. Mindful leaders. They all have their blinds spots. My job as a coach is to ask provocative questions to surface the root issues that are serving as blocks to their success, and help people resolve and remove those blocks, so that they can get back to the business of… Continue reading Let’s get real: provocative questions
Think of decisions instead as "best" in the moment, and "adjustable" if necessary. You can trust yourself and be all in - just decide.
Decide how you're going to show up regardless of others' reactions, responses, or behavior.
Whether anxiety is a daily battle, or it's something that crops up in your life occasionally, it can be crippling and distracting. But it doesn't have to be this way. When anxiety builds, you can learn to dissipate it - without fundamentally changing who you are or the circumstances you're in. Join this webinar on… Continue reading Alternative to Anxiety
Are we a good match for a coaching engagement?
Sometimes, it's hard to kick down the intensity of your thoughts in these crazy times. So stop trying. Do this instead!
You have to be willing to feel the discomfort of growth and risk in order to achieve the levels of performance you seek.
Sometimes, I get questions about my company name and logo; people want the story behind my brand. I love telling people about those origins! I thought I would do a fun Q&A here. Q: What does Aurelian mean? A. Aurelian is a color on the yellow/gold part of the spectrum. Yellow is the color of… Continue reading Behind my brand: the company name and logo
Check out this week's short video (<5 min) to learn how to ask yourself the question that will give you greater freedom, to get everything you want. (As a side note, the link heads over to my free Career Prime Facebook Group - you should definitely join!) https://www.facebook.com/aureliancoach/videos/450133559186335/UzpfSTE5NDg0MzA1ODIwODQ2MjE6Vks6Mzk4MjQ4Njk0NDIzOTkx/ If you're more of a reader than… Continue reading Get everything you want
You need a crystal clear roadmap to your next promotion. Without it, you're floating around aimlessly, hoping for lightning to strike.
There's not enough curiosity in our jobs, and there should be. Curiosity can be an excellent alternative to anxiety or uncertainty.
Positioning yourself for opportunity is all about storytelling. But before you get wrapped up in how you tell your story to others, revisit the "career stories" you tell yourself. Make sure you evaluate the narratives you've developed about your interests and goals, your work history, your failures and capabilities, and determine whether those serve you… Continue reading Revisit the “career stories” you tell yourself. Are they holding you back?
Let's separate your decisions to do something - or not do something - in your career from whether you are capable of accomplishing it.
A little planning, a little letting go, and a heavy dose of gratitude will help you effectively manage working on vacation.
You can't manage your career more proactively if you have thinking that holds you back. Resolve the most common mindset blocks! By doing so, you free yourself up to make better decisions and sound investments in yourself. This is a million times better rather than pouring time, energy, and money into externalities that you don't… Continue reading Mindset blocks: let’s get rid of these
Keep a career journal to help you surface and address both uncertainties and opportunities, and begin crafting a career with purpose.
The focused and effective leader knows how to communicate well. Here are 3 ways to determine whether you are in command of your communication.
No experience? Transferable skills not enough? There's one other thing you can do to get in the door.
When you find the root of your motivations for working, you can write your career vision statement which serves as your professional North Star.
LinkedIn published a survey reporting that the #1 soft skill wanted by employers was creativity. Are you creative in your job?
How can you tell a good coach from a not-good one? This is how.
You don't have to wait until an authority grants you an opportunity before doing something you feel needs to be done.
There are different ways to speak up at work, and you can decide which strategy to use at any opportunity.
Learn the single most powerful way to increase your own relevance and impact within your network.
A one page resume at mid-career is a huge opportunity to demonstrate the impact you've had on your organizations.
To position yourself well for promotion into leadership, tell your stories from the perspective of the organization's goals and challenges.
Appreciating the difference between career and a vocation (or true calling) means that you can leverage one to improve the other.
Recognize the opportunity that arises when you delegate tasks... and discover how to ride out the ensuing frustration you experience from oversight duties.
You're at a conference. You are constantly meeting people, collecting business cards or LinkedIn connections. And then you get back to the office and try to catch up to the slew of email and neglected projects... putting the networking follow up on the back-burner for a bit. And you never really get back to it.… Continue reading Networking follow up
Historically, people approach negotiation with some level of negativity: fear, uncertainty, disadvantage, aggression. The "new order" of negotiation uses a more sophisticated, emotionally intelligent approach: empathy. It might seem strange at first, but if you think about the conditions that make a negotiation favorable all the way around, there is some level of trust among… Continue reading High-EQ negotiation
Today, we are going to tackle a bit of an evergreen question that professionals often struggle with, and that is how to talk about yourself. Whether it's advancement into management or positioning yourself for another job or industry change, the way to talk about yourself in an effective and meaningful way is to ask yourself… Continue reading How to position for change: “Who are you,” exactly?
One of the most challenging biases to overcome is confirmation bias. To address this, you can look to information sources that might seem unrelated at first, but can provide valid underlying concepts that might challenge your assumptions. You can also talk to outsiders in order to test that your information will hold up under scrutiny.… Continue reading Addressing confirmation bias: what information sources do you need?
I love the holidays - and I love helping people get over their discomfort around networking. So this season, I will combine my two loves for a fantastic networking challenge! If you are interested in participating, sign up for the Aurelian Skill Masters group at the top bar by entering your name and email, and… Continue reading The 12 Days of Networking! Sign up for a great networking challenge.
Aurelian Coaching is hosting a free webinar on this topic on Thursday, June 4 at 7am Pacific/ 10am Eastern. Register to either join live or get a replay link. Click to register for free webinar When you are doing something you haven't done before, when you want to do well but are intimidated, you need… Continue reading Confidence vs Self- Confidence
Does anyone else feel like they're constantly on the defensive? External circumstances are thrust upon us. We respond as best as we can. Let me offer an alternative to being on the defensive: being more proactive. Being proactive actually doesn't take more energy than being passive or reactive. The energy you use in being proactive… Continue reading Being proactive in uncertain times
Registration for this free webinar is below. "I *really* need to create some boundaries at work…" When I tell people what's actually involved in setting healthy boundaries, it gives them pause. It might make them uncomfortable.It might shed new light on their circumstances.It might make them second guess whether they need a boundary at all.… Continue reading Setting healthy boundaries at work
On this side of career risk, where you are today, you may have fear and uncertainty. But on the other side of that risk, once you take that leap, you will know exactly what happened. The difference is simply preparation - knowing what to do if things go sideways. Avoiding risk isn't the answer. Check… Continue reading Career risk: get to the other side
Whether you are trying to get promoted, land a big bonus, or change your career, fix your mindset to see success. Surface and address limiting thoughts holding you back. Then you can achieve all you want to achieve in 2020! Take advantage of a 20% discount on a 6-session career mindset coaching engagement for the… Continue reading Mindset coaching
As you might know, Aurelian Coaching regularly provides career and management guidance through various media channels (Reader's Digest, Medium, Girlboss, the USAToday network, and more). I have a few new ones to report, this time via UpJourney. Check them out below! https://upjourney.com/phone-interview-tips https://upjourney.com/how-to-end-a-professional-email
I've taken this week's blog entry onto another channel for a change. Check out my Medium article on how traditional, standard resume formats are actually a disservice to mid-career professionals. I describe three specific ways to change your resume to speak from a place of impact, value, and expertise over experience.
A number of clients seeking my guidance on becoming better workers, better managers, or better planners inevitably ask about how to develop positive habits... and stick with them. When I ask what they've done to date in developing new positive habits, and why they believe they've failed to maintain them, two themes arise: The achievers… Continue reading Positive habits: a new approach
Many leadership articles discuss how to communicate with and effectively manage the millennials. But what about managing an age gap in the other direction? How should millennial managers supervise someone older - maybe much older? There can be a decades-wide spread between a manager and a direct report. Awkward, uncomfortable, even upsetting? Most of the… Continue reading Big age gaps between managers and direct reports
I had a few clients who were expressing sentiments such as: "I'm not feeling like myself," or, "I'm just not how I used to be on the job," or, "I'm not really feeling it anymore, and I don't know why." They attribute these feelings to no longer being challenged at work, or having no growth… Continue reading The learning cycle at work
Procrastination can feel stressful. For some, the stress comes from not having produced anything yet. For others, the stress comes from the label "procrastinator" and actually has little to do with what has been produced by when. Which are you? Because it matters. If the stress of procrastination comes from the label - and all of… Continue reading Procrastination gets a bad rap
How do you really know if you should leave your job? At the root of this question is not salary and benefits and commute and flexibility. If it were really about those things, you could evaluate the trade-offs and make a decision already. But if the question about whether to leave your job is lingering,… Continue reading Making the tough decision to leave your job
How to be assertive is one of those topics that I've always found to be a little funny. Assertive in what way? Assertive according to whom? If you've ever received the constructive criticism or professional feedback to be more assertive or to be less assertive, and you're struggling with this feedback, I've got some great… Continue reading Rethinking how to be assertive
Just one critical implementation issue will ruin the most beautiful, perfect strategy. I'd like to talk about those types of implementation issues. In my mind, there are only three: insufficient buy-in from people; failure to achieve brilliant execution; and lack of a pivot when new information points to the strategy being wrong. Even if you… Continue reading Avoid an implementation issue that ruins a great strategy
UPDATE: Check out this week's Facebook Live on this topic, which does a deep dive with some practical steps not included in this blog post: https://www.facebook.com/aureliancoach/videos/308451219960456/ The foundation of navigating change in your organization's leadership is managing up. You must align your work and results with the priority initiatives of your (new) leadership. While you… Continue reading Navigating change: how to be visible and protect yourself
When I ran divisions and managed people, and when I oversaw client initiatives and led multi-disciplinary teams, there was one thing I always protected for my staff, my clients, and myself: Vacation time. I'll be away for the rest of the summer, and I'll see you back at the end of August/ beginning of September… Continue reading See you in a few weeks!
The bottom line in any service interaction and engagement is to move forward toward resolution. When you feel stuck in those customer service engagements, when things are really not moving forward (or moving forward productively), maintain the following tricks up your sleeve to gain some traction. (Note: I use the term "customer service" very broadly. Customers… Continue reading Customer service secrets
Knowing how to set boundaries at work in unhealthy or unproductive situations is an important skill, both for yourself and ultimately for the team involved. But what does it mean to set boundaries at work, and how should you do it to achieve the desired outcome? Let's start by talking about what a boundary is.… Continue reading 3 questions to ask before you set boundaries at work
Challenges of midlevel managers have some common themes, one of them being managing multiple initiatives within limited resources. "Limited resources" might be defined as not enough people, not enough budget, or not enough time (or all three). There are two types of work we perform: daily whirlwind tasks and larger, overarching initiatives. You'll need to… Continue reading Two questions if you are managing with limited resources
Working in isolation is very rare these days, so when one of your team members is fired, it can have a negative ripple effect that can seriously impact productivity. So when employee termination affects your team, what should you do? Of course, it's important to get work done - even more so when you're one… Continue reading After employee termination: how to care for the existing team
Networking warm or hot can be easy. Networking cold - especially if you're more introverted and don't have a lot of practice under your belt - can be extremely intimidating. When I was starting, the idea of just showing up somewhere and chatting people up was awkward and confusing. But I've learned a few things… Continue reading Networking: The 4 Things You’re Probably Not Doing But Should Be
Strengths and weaknesses. Areas of command vs. areas of improvement. Stuff you're good at on one hand, and stuff you're bad at on the other hand. People often present these characteristics at opposite ends of a spectrum or as absolutes. You might get similar feedback at work year after year, and even with nominal improvements,… Continue reading Strengths and weaknesses: Using one as a gateway to address the other
In 2011, Grant Cordone wrote a book called The 10X Rule. In it, he described how to take "massive action" toward your goals. It's very much a rah-rah-rah book, geared toward salespeople and entrepreneurs, but when I read it, its concept of "more is more" didn't quite resonate with me. Other books and online resources about… Continue reading The 10x Rule: How Fear and Discomfort Can Signal the Path Forward
Many interview processes these days involve on-the-spot business case analysis. Companies do this to assess a candidate's thought process, and whether the candidate follows any particular methodology in their analysis. There are many methodologies out there, and I've created a simplified model for my clients specifically to employ during the interview process if they have… Continue reading Business case method: a simplified model for interviewing
Good management requires some solid systems in place to manage toward or against. You can create systems and effective SOPs (standard operating procedures) for any operational aspect of your and your team's work. This includes running meetings, documentation, projects execution, individual and team reviews - the list goes on. Naturally, companies have systems and SOPs… Continue reading Writing effective SOPs: 3 points most people miss
Being a boss is a job, an actual job. Being a manager means you need to learn how to do employee recognition well for your direct reports as part of your duties and responsibilities... even if it's not explicitly listed in your job description. Employee recognition = acknowledgement + reward. If you know how to… Continue reading Employee recognition: Here’s how to do it right.
Even if you're the type of person who loves your job and doesn't mind being consumed by it, at one point or another, you've probably faced the challenge of how to limit the mental energy you expend on work in non-work situations. You've searched for a way to make sure you leave work at work… Continue reading Successfully Manage the Mental Work-Home Transition (The Solution Is Not What You Might Think!)
I remember having to fill out performance reviews where one of the questions on the forms assessed the "creativity" of the employee. Creativity? Hm. At that time, to me, creativity either had to do with art (not relevant in my line of work), or the demonstration of some grand, brilliant solution to a problem that… Continue reading You can actually cultivate creativity. Here’s how.
Turnover sucks, but it happens! As a manager, congratulations: it might be your job to replace people who leave your team. While you may or may not have complete authority in the whole process, you know you've got to conduct an interview (probably a bunch of them). This is your roadmap for making sure you… Continue reading Conduct an Interview to Land the Right Person: The Midlevel Manager’s Guide
For many organizations, mid-year reviews on job performance are either underway or soon to be underway. You probably developed goals for 2018 in the latter part of 2017, and it's the perfect time to see how far we've come! ... or how far we haven't come. Every year, a few of my direct reports would… Continue reading Mid-Year Reviews: Only Two Solutions You Need to Get Back on Track
Use email only when you need to impart information, not have an exchange of information.
Companies often set up their management roles as rewards for outstanding individual performance. There is one fundamental problem with this: individual achievement has nothing to do with good management. (See my post on the differences among leadership and management and authority.) But all is not lost! In order to transition well from stellar individual performance to… Continue reading Growth Mindset: The #1 Key to Management Mastery
When I interviewed a number of mid-career managers about their greatest pain points, one item came up again and again: managing up. You can find a lot of great articles online about managing up, and they're useful for tips and things you can try to do to manage up better. However, I'm interested in exploring… Continue reading Managing Up: Address the 3 Biggest Challenges to Mastering this Elusive Skill
https://youtu.be/meAGOgBHL5w This week, we are reviewing the 3-2-1 Model for Critical Thinking. I walk you through it in the video above. In the Analysis step, we ask two questions: (1) How we decide to interpret the information we receive, and (2) What principles, whether from different perspectives, viewpoints or assumptions, we are applying. Let me make… Continue reading New perspective in critical thinking
I simplified critical thinking into a short model because I would rather we all practice it more systematically in our daily lives. I would prefer to see that critical thinking is not something we have to strive toward when it really matters, but rather, we flex that muscle so regularly, it's second-nature. Super complex critical… Continue reading Application of the 3-2-1 Model for Critical Thinking
I have a simplified model for critical thinking to share with you. (If you are interested in more complex models, you can check out The Foundation for Critical Thinking, Pearson's RED model, or others.) We define critical thinking as analyzing information prior to making a judgment. Therefore, at its most elemental, my version of a… Continue reading The 3-2-1 Model for Critical Thinking
For situations in which you do decide to be 100% accountable, it's not something you mention to people. It is only something you can rise to the occasion for.
Good managers understand that they cannot make someone be accountable. That is only for the individual to accept and act on.
The key to avoiding the victim manager mindset is understanding the difference between responsibility and accountability.
What if you could just... not meet?
Ask people to respect your meeting.
The D.A.R.T. Method(TM) applied to note-taking for meetings: doing it right.
Reduce brain clutter with a proven method of taking efficient meeting notes.
Set your team up for making decisions.
What if being proactive meant not that you prepare for what's coming, but that you CREATE what's coming?
If you want to learn how to be proactive at work, step outside the existing rules of engagement.
Being proactive is never just finishing ahead or doing an exceptional job.
Don't just survive negative situations. Be proactive to learn how to thrive.
Here is what we should ask ourselves to figure out how to be proactive.
You can begin resilience at any time, and kick it up a notch at any time.
Be prepared to do extra to make up for being "in the negative" when you mess up.
Resilience is really about a super simple concept: doing better next time.
Own it. All of it.
Resilience: we are not our decisions.
An interview with Victoria Lioznyansky of ByVictoriaL.com
While people can feel comfortable putting together slides, people often don't know how to prepare a speech.
A lot of anxiety is in just getting started. So start strong.
Prepare presentations and speeches without using jargon as a crutch.
Go back to basics for presentations and public speaking. Tell a story.
Sometimes, perfectionists don't want to figure things out in public.
Know what a "perfect" draft is and circulate it quicker to get closer to a "perfect" end product.
Consider this: what if YOU made all the decisions?
Everything can be improved upon, including your very best work.
What's the big deal? What's wrong with having high standards? Nothing, except...
You can proactively reject burnout as a condition of your life.
If you are suffering from burnout, you've got to put a question mark on the addiction to multi-tasking.
Everything is not - cannot possibly be - important.